The biggest difference between men and women is what comes to mind when the word 'Facial' is used.

What is the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A genealogist looks up your family tree. A gynecologist looks up your family bush.

What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dick is hanging out

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? I want you inside me!

What did the bra say to the hat? You go on a head while I give these two a lift!

Why is being in the military like a blow-job? The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are YOU shaking? She's going to eat me!

Why does no one die a virgin? Cause life fucks us all.

If I had a donkey and you had a chicken and if my donkey ate your chicken what will we have? Three feet of your cock up my ass.

What's the difference between being hungry and horny? Where you put the cucumber.

If a dove is the "bird of peace" then what's the bird of "true love"? The swallow.

Who was the worlds first carpenter? Eve, because she made Adams banana stand

Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly?

Why don't stoners get into arguments? Because they take the high road.